Wednesday, December 07, 2005
Martha Stewart got robbed. Okay, well, I suppose I see the irony in that statement - her being an ex-con and all. But I'm not talking about Martha's jail stint. I'm talking about her show! "The Apprentice: Martha Stewart" has been cancelled after this, the first season. What a gyp! So maybe Martha doesn't have the bling of The Donald or the grit of a Survivor or the flash of an Amazing Race. But the woman's done Hard Time, for heaven's sake! Until now, Martha Stewart was untouchable. I mean, who among us has kayaked to a meadow in Norway, shorn our own sheep, spun our own wool, then knitted our own sweater?! But now, FINALLY, I can relate. Don't get me wrong - I've not logged any time behind bars. But I've made my fair share of flubs. The only way to get past them is to keep plugging away, to climb back on that horse, to exhaust all applicable cliches. Martha did just that, and how do we reward such pluck? With a big old pink slip, that's how! So I say, Free Martha! Free her from her houndstooth-checkered past! Subscribe to her magazine! Watch her daytime show! Visit her website! Buy her wares! And keep Martha in our lives! Keep her around if for no other reason than to satiate our desire to finally feel Holier Than Thou.